Is Change Possible In An Abuser?
People change.
That small, two-word sentence is actually a huge, significant statement that carries a lot of weight. We grow up learning about change — the inevitability of it, the uncertainty it can bring. We change — our opinions, personalities, careers, friends, and much more. But people often wonder: Is change possible in an abuser?
“In many abusive relationships, the warning signs are evident relatively early on in a relationship but may only become clear in hindsight or be easier for others to see. However, the lines to recognizing domestic violence become even more blurred for those in LGBTQ+ communities”.
Most abusers follow the same “playbook,” which is often demonstrated as the Power and Control Wheel. While many of the same actions such as destroying the victim’s self-esteem or isolating victims from friends and family are just as prevalent among LGBTQ+ abusers, there are unique methods of abuse that these abusers will use to exert power and control over their victims.
This past month, June, was Pride month. It’s a great time to educate ourselves on what LGBTQ2 means. We hear it quite a bit, but do we understand what it means? Do we know what “two-spirit” refers to? The more we know – the less we can “other” each other. The less we “other” each other, the more likely we are to step in when we see someone in need – when we see someone in pain or who might be hurting. Violence happens in all relationships, regardless of sexual orientation. Let’s get to know each other, so if we’re needed we understand.
Haven Office: 918.554.2836 or 918.55.HAVEN
Text Line: 918.533.3070
Director
Kellie Allemann
Program and Grant Administrator/Crime Victim Advocate
Cathleen Osborne-Gowey
Outreach Coordinator/Advocate
Tracie DeLano
Manager and Victim of Crime Legal Advocate
Caren Hall
Advocate and Transitional Housing Advocate
Kaytlynn Johnson
Mobile Advocate
Joy McCoy
Victim of Crime Intake Advocate
Lisa Shamblin
Email: havenprogram@estoo.net
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