What is Gaslighting?
Does your partner repeatedly say things that confuse you? Because of this, do you often start questioning your own perception of reality within your relationship? Do you question your sanity altogether? If so, your partner may be using what mental health professionals call “gaslighting.”
Where does “gaslighting” come from?
This term comes from the 1938 stage play Gas Light, in which a husband attempts to drive his wife crazy by dimming the lights (which were powered by gas) in their home, and then he later denies that the light changed when his wife points it out. It is an extremely effective form of emotional abuse that causes a victim to question their own feelings, instincts, and sanity. As a result, the abusive partner has a lot of power (and we know that abuse is about power and control). Indeed, once an abusive partner has broken down the victim’s ability to trust their own perceptions, the victim is more likely to stay in the abusive relationship.
Gaslighting can be a powerful tool for an abuser. It is important to recognize it and be ready to respond.
8 Boundaries for People who Gaslight You:
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“Let’s move on- we have different view of what happened.”
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“If you continue to speak to me this way I am not engaging.”
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“We remember things differently.”
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“I won’t argue with you about something I know I experienced.”
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“This conversation is over if you continue to twist my words.”
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“I need to take a break from this disucssion.”
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“I will not discuss this with you any further today.”
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“My feelings and experience are valid and I need you to respect that.”
Full Article from National Domestic Violence Hotline
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